Sam's 'Scrap' Book

Love or something like it ?...

2007-04-19T16:05:00.000-07:00

Since I was a kid . since every1 has this childhood dilemma of picturing love as something so forbidden and something so sinful for that matter. Why does every1 want to grow up and fall in love. Kya rakha hai pyar main ? ... yehi sawal poochtay thay aap apnay aap say when u were little and watched those O so mega cheesy govinda raveena movies. No seriously .. looking at something from a distance with a pinchful of curiosity. har cheez achee to lagtee hai . the million dollar question is , paas jakar bhi kya wohi cheez achee lagay gee ? ... a very simple answer . paas jakar dekh lo ..
Lekin un logon ka kya kiya jaye jo paas ana hee nai chahtay . jo duur say hee kharay hokar wanna feel just the intensity , the strength of it all. No you cant really hate them for standing just there. You appreciate their patience , their way of looking at things. At love. at the ultimate depth of it. Maybe they can look much deeper into it than you, yes they really can. Wouldn't u just wanna fall in love with a person like that . tell me wouldn't you ? ..

Calling all the stars to fall
And catch the silver sunlight in your hands
Come for me and set me free
Lift me up and take me where I stand

She believes in everything
And everyone and you and yours and mine
I've waited for a thousand years
For you to come and blow me out my mind

She's the queen of all I've seen
And every song and city far and near
Heaven help my mademoiselle,
She rings the bell for all the world to hear

- Oasis (Lyla)

Comfortably Numb

2007-04-18T16:48:00.000-07:00

Just a little pin prick
There'll be no more pain
But you may feel a little sick
Can you stand up?
I do believe it's working, good
That'll keep you going through the show
Come on it's time to go.
- Comfortably Numb

everytime i lissin to this track i feel like the guitar riff's are meant for me . every single twang goes thru my spine. I cant really get enuff of this trak. Do i say that about all the other tracks too.. ? But I dont want to be comfortably numb. i want to feel the numb pain. is it somethin too good to ask for. why the hell am i asking myself so many questions. is it because its 5 in the morning and i didnt get to talk to her . ? ..

plunging into.....

2007-02-25T21:45:00.000-08:00

Holding my forehead while the tunes make their way into my head, tormenting every inch of my soul, subtle yet so incredibly harsh, ecstatic but so profusely spontaneous -The feeling of being swept away when it makes its way down my spine . That never ending feeling of a second going by, taking so long to end and making me realize every moment that a second beholds.
That feeling of plunging my head into a pool of freezing water and keeping it down until my nerves die out. That feeling of a thousand needles spearing their way into my face. Voices asking you to pull urself out , but you just don't want to. Tightening ur fists while the blood stops flowing to ur hands and head.
Why , Oh why do I want to plunge into such depth and coldness... ?

Erase & Rewind

2007-02-25T20:15:00.000-08:00

"Hey, what did you hear me say
you know the difference it makes
what did you hear me say

Yes, I said it's fine before
I don't think so no more
I said it's fine before
I've changed my mind
I take it back

Erase and rewind
'cause I've been changing my mind
I've changed my mind

So where did you see me go
it's not the right way, you know
where did you see me go
No, it's not that I don't know
I just don't want it to grow
It's not that I don't know
I've changed my mind
I take it back Hey, what did you hear me say
you know the difference it makes
what did you hear me say

Yes, I said it's fine before
I don't think so no more
I said it's fine before
I've changed my mind
I take it back

Erase and rewind
'cause I've been changing my mind
I've changed my mind

So where did you see me go
it's not the right way, you know
where did you see me go
No, it's not that I don't know
I just don't want it to grow
It's not that I don't know
I've changed my mind
I take it back."

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Ever had that urge to do exactly what this song says, change everything. Erase your present and rewind it back to the future or erase your past to cherish a future you always wanted. But what if you wanted to erase everything just to rewind back to nothing , rewind back to that numbness u'd never thought u'd be a slave to, rewind it back to that so called darkness u always feared when u walked into a room that was so dark , you could hear the darkness. What could make you do such a thing. What could make you revert back to such darkness and make u obsessed with loneliness , wouldn't you just want to rewind back to a happy memory , a happy phase , a happy moment that went past in your life.
The common man is deprived from the power of 'undo' . but what if you were granted that magic wand just to go back .. hitch a ride back to where u always wanted to go . Where would u go ? ...

Morning Darkness

2007-02-18T01:16:00.000-08:00

*yawn*

Got up early , as I usually do on working days. Donno it was un usually dark this time.. not that I was dreaming or somethin. Lookin outta my window is prolly the first thing I do when i get up . and dunt ask me why . its like i just do it, may sound silly ..but u have no right to call it silly.
This time when i was lookin out , there was this really beautiful bird sitting outside my window. I could see it clearly. It was dark shiny .. and NO it was not a crow. I had seen this bird before too.
Urdu main isko "Koyal" kehtay hain . but i have no clue whats it called in English. another reason to prove how silly I am . khair.. As I came closer , to have a more curious look at it . It made that sound every koyal makes . tht beautiful Hum which somehow resembles to a small child.
It flew away before I could get any closer. leaving me motionless fer a second that lasted longer than ever.. spinning thru my mind that wonderful feeling a small bird can induce onto you..

Ok , this is where i start gettin ready , or i'll be late for work..

Aitebar.

2007-02-16T19:56:00.000-08:00

"Aitebar bhee aahee jayey ga
Milo to sahee
Raasta koyee milhee jayey ga
Chalo to sahee, chalo to sahee

Aitebar bhee aahee jayey ga, aahee jayey ga

Dhoop mein khara jalraha houn mein
Saaya do mujhey
Yeh mera junoon
Yeh meri jalun
Hai meri saza

Meri yeh thakun
Kherahee hai kya
Suno to sahee, suno to sahee

Aitebar bhee aahee jayey ga, aahee jayey ga

Kya huwa agar zindagee
Zara bhoulsey gayey socho to zara,
Jungulon mein bhee raastey to hain
Humey bhee koyee milhee jayey ga
Chalo to sahee, chalo to sahee

Pyar vyar bhee hohee gayey ga
Milo to sahee raasta koyee milhee jayeye ga
Chalo to sahee, chalo to sahee

Aitebar bhee aahee jayey ga, aahee jayey ga
Aahee jayey ga, aahee jayey ga. "

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A've lost count as to how many time a've heard this track now. This is what some one told me , 'not because its mushy or cheesy but because it somehows suits me or my thoughts' . Hope i got that right. Isnt it just that song which u'd luv to sing while walking down that empty corridoor at college , that song when ur speeding down the stairway . That song when ur waiting for a bus or a van on ur way to work or skool or coll. That song when ur skippin ur way back home thinkin about what have u set up for the rest of the day. Not everyone may agree with this school of thought, but truly a master piece by JJ.

That cup of tea

2007-02-14T15:40:00.000-08:00

Sitting infront of my PC . 4:43 A.M. is the time I see in my taskbar. staring at my cup of tea and seeing the hot tea makin its steamy way out of the cup. Its one of those times when you feel like you have absolutely nothing to do but just sit and spend a couple of more hours before you go back home. But then again when you get back home , you're stuck in that nothing to do phase again. Round robbin state. is that what our lives have become, a slave to that chronological lifestyle of scheduling everything accordingly . well uhh atleast mine has. It didnt start off today if that's what you're thinking. Its been on fer lets see over a month now. yes am at work and enjoying every bit of it . *period* .